Because there aren't enough ways to imbibe caffeine in this fast-paced world of ours, Rudolph Foods has combined America's passion for not sleeping with its unquenchable desire for snack foods: introducing Engobi, the "love child of caffeine and snack chips." It's junk food for those who are lacking the precious time or the energy to get their empty calories and caffeination from separate sources. Referring to itself as a "functional food, a single 1.5-ounce bag of Engobi chips contains approximately 1.75 times as much caffeine as a can of your average energy drink, all for the low price of $1.29.

And really, what would a caffeinated snack food be without the appropriate video game tie-in and roving tour of scantily clad women? The company is running a "Girls, Guitars and Geeks City Tour," with a Guitar Hero-equipped van, giving gamers willing to leave their basements the chance to compete for Guitar Hero controllers and gear emblazoned with the name of everyone's favorite insomnia-inducing snack product.

Says the company's VP, Mark Singleton: ""If this contest, the Engobi girls, or our high-octane Engobi snack chips don't perk you up, I'm not sure you have a pulse. With Engobi on the scene, couch potatoes just earned a place on the endangered species list." That's probably how I would talk too, if I were full of Lemon Lift and Cinnamon Surge. No doubt a plethora of "woos!" were tossed in for good measure.

For more info on the irritatingly titled "Don't Be a Piano Hero" promotion, visit Engobi's site. Woo!