As a matter of principle, I've largely purged emoticons from my online vernacular. While I appreciate their ability to convey the wide spectrum of the human experience in a few swift keystrokes, there's something inside that just won't allow me to sum up my feeling with a couple of punctuation marks.

That said, it's almost impossible for me to find anything negative to say about The Emoticon Transforming Stamp. In stationary mode, the stamp bears a perpetual happy face. Squeeze its sides and it adopts any emotion you can flex it into.

I'm not sure how flexible the thing is, so emotions like pensive, introspective, and existentially lugubrious might be out of its range, but heck, for $5.99 it's worth a shot.