For the past year or so, environmental groups have come out against bottled water in a big way. One of the principle arguments is that, unlike, say Coca-Cola, water is widely available in non-bottled form, making the massive volumes of plastic that the industry churns through a bit superfluous.

While there's certainly validity to this claim, one has to feel for the folks in the bottled-water industry, which has turned from a bastion of health consciousness to a public safety threat virtually overnight. The industry has been doing what it can to keep the criticism to a minimum, issuing press releases about recycling programs and designing bottles that use less plastic. If they were really savvy, however, the PR folks would turn their efforts toward a straw man. If I might be so bold as to recommend Big Ox.

Folks have been pushing canned oxygen as the next big thing for some time now, and with pitches like this, who are we to argue?

Food, water and oxygen are key to a healthy lifestyle. Today's on-the-go people enhance their diets with vitamins and all-natural food supplements. They drink pure water and energy drinks to improve their vitality. So why not enhance the fuel our bodies need most frequently?

The Big Ox's "Power Oxygen" is clearly the answer to your extreme lifestyle. The company's canned oxygen comes in Citrus Blast, Mountain Mint, Polar Rush, and Tropical Breeze flavors, and promises to combine the extremeness of energy drinks with the sensation of huffing glue (presumably without the, you know, brain damage).

To its credit, the Big Ox site does include a note suggesting that everyone recycle their cans.

In the meantime, I heard about a really sweet deal on bags of dirt.