Remember when I wrote about and discussed on Gearlog Radio about the two families who are battling in court over a missing iPod nano? Well, both families have been contacted by reps from Judge Judy to appear on her show. I'm a huge fan of Judge Judy. This is how I imagine the case will go:

Judge Judy: Let's see what we've got here today. Okay, so your daughter is blaming her classmate Stephanie for not keeping an eye on her iPod mini.

McCarthy family: Excuse me, your honor. It was an iPod nano.

Judge Judy: Do I have 'stupid' written over my forehead? Do you think I don't know the difference between a mini and a nano? I own an iPod with video, so there! Okay, so Stephanie lost your daughter's nano. What do you want me to do about it?

McCarthy family: Well, we were hoping that the Eick family would admit that what she did was wrong and accept the responsibility to pay back my daughter the cost of her iPod nano. She worked really hard to earn one.

JJ: Okay, do you know when you tell someone to watch something and you come back and it's gone? It's called 'Tough Sh*t'. Have you ever heard that, Ma'am? I like that phrase. I'm going to put it on coffee mugs.

McCarthy family: But what about my daughter's needs? Her iPod meant the world to her. It's the only way she can keep up with the latest artists so her friends don't tease her. She is a freshman in high school now.

JJ: Don't spit on my cupcake and tell me it's frosting, ma'am! Do I look like I care? Now let's talk with the accused family. So what's your deal?

Eick family: My daughter wanted to listen to Shannon's nano, so Stephanie let her borrow it. But then the bell rang, and Shannon had to get to class, so she'd figure she would leave the nano on Stephanie's desk for when she got back. My daughter feels bad that the nano is now gone, but what can you do? We know it costs a couple of hundreds of dollars but Shannon didn't have to let her borrow it. She could have...

JJ: Have you ever heard of the K.I.S.S. principle? Keep It Simple, Stupid!

Eick family: Hey, I don't think you should talk that way toward us.

JJ: This is my courtroom, and I can say what I want. The day that you become a judge, we'll talk then. Let me explain something to both of you. My husband ruined my red sweater on December 8, 1978 in the wash. It was 20 degrees outside that day. My hair was in curlers. Most people have a memory of important dates and times. I would remember some of the circumstances surrounding the event of the missing nano - because your daughter, Ms. McCarthy, seems to have a very, very good memory of everything about her iPod - what color it was, how much it cost, how many songs were on it, and how much those songs cost - the only thing she didn't happen to have a memory of is remembering to go back for it. You get it?

McCarthy family: Are you insane b*tch? Who cares about your stupid red sweater!

JJ: Are you on any medication, ma'am?

McCarthy family: No, I'm not, thank you very much! We just want what's owed to us.

JJ: Fine. Judgment to the plaintiff for the amount of $9.99 - the price of a Kevin Federline CD. Thank you.

[iPodLounge via Chicago Tribune]